I need an easy friend, I need someone bland.
Nobody in particular, just a good liar like me
So I can tell everybody all our cool stories


I want to feel shallow and I want to be hollow.
I want to blend with the in-crowd.
I wanna listen to their music turned up real loud.
Make me feel used, turn me into your toy.
Never tell me the truth, just show me your joy.

And leave me here, laying on my bed
Alone in my head, with time to reflect
And I fit in; I belong to your crowd.
I’m assimilated; I think I’m cool now.

I wanna be white, and think that I’m black.
I want all the hot chicks when I run track.
I wanna smoke, and I wanna drink.
I want someone to always tell me what to think.

I wanna be an asshole, I wanna be a hater
I wanna make people cut themselves with their rusty razors.
Coz they’re ugly, and boring,
and they don’t know how to dress.
They think too hard, and have bad friends.
Everyone tells me they’re useless.

I wanna laugh at all the punks and those boring emo-things.
I’ll only listen to Saliva, and Eminem and everything in between.
Coz I’m cool now, and I can be sedated.
I can’t wear these jeans, they aren’t pre-faded.
And my rugby shirt, the stripes gotta be big.
If I don’t shop at Abercrombie, that means my daddy drives a rig.
And that’s really bad, coz my parents are really corporate tools.
And they’ll do anything to please me and keep me in school.
So I can go to college, drink, and be just like them.
I can’t wait until I’m graduating.

I can’t wait to become a bigger tool!